Frank Goddard

“To my right/left – the names of…”

Just a simple little ice-breaker that people used to play years ago, to pass the time at parties.

Unless you were playing it with Frank.

Under what I can only describe as Frank’s benign dictatorship, that trivial little word game would disappear in a flurry of bizarre rules from off the top of his head which, even if you heard them above the chaos that followed , you didn’t stand a snowflake’s chance of obeying.

But that didn’t matter – because you had the rare delight of laughing until your face hurt. And he could keep this going for hours. I don’t know if Frank invented the Mr Chairman – Mr Speaker variation, but he was without a doubt the absolute, undisputed master of it.

This was Frank’s gift. It didn’t matter what the social occasion was – a Saturday night on the tiles, a quiet Sunday pub lunch followed by a stroll on the moors, or a Christian youth group’s weekend retreat – if Frank was going to be there, that was all the guarantee you needed that it was going to be fun. Some people have to put a lot of effort into trying to makes themselves popular. It doesn’t work like that. You’ve either got that sheer force of personality – like Frank – or you haven’t.

Of course, it’s nice to be liked by everyone, but it does carry the risk of developing a shallow ego. Frank avoided that trap. The personal tributes which have flowed in following his untimely death are a catalogue of practical acts of kindness and generosity which he didn’t shout about, he just got on and did what was necessary where a bit of help was required. I recall when I was shutting myself away in the depths of depression and I was hard work to be around, Frank didn’t waste his breath on well-intentioned but meaningless advice to pull myself together, snap out of it, look on the bright side. Frank’s therapy – practical and effective – was to just turn up on the doorstep and tell me: “Get your coat on, you’re going out.”

I’ve enjoyed Frank’s friendship for 31 years, and the hole he leaves by his early departure is huge – but it’s comforting to know that he passed so much of his good-natured spirit onto Eve, Kate and Jack. Not only are they effortlessly funny, witty and bright, but I also want to thank them for their kindness and generosity – in the midst of their grief – in making sure that I should be among the first to hear the sad news about their much-loved dad. For as long as they live, I know the very best of Frank will live too.

“To my right/left – the names of…” a better friend that anyone could ever hope for. Goodbye Frank.

Nick Williams