Wine o’clock on Friday has arrived not a moment too soon this week. It’s been so packed full of fuckwittery that I’m struggling to get my fractious thoughts out on the page before the warm process of unfucking my brain by irresponsible drinking overcomes me. I’ve become pretty much immune to probation officers refraining from returning my calls, clients getting pissy that I’ve mislaid my magic wand and crystal ball, and the Ministry of Justice computer system saying no, in triplicate. I’m also doing my regular, end of the month, call dodging from British Gas who want me to settle my account. I have to report that my new tactic of pretending not to be me when they ring, and putting on a bad Eastern European au pair’s accent is working well so far. Winding up Indian call centre staff isn’t big or cleaver, but it allows my some respite from my straightened circumstances with a bit of a childish giggle.
What’s really got my dander well and truly elevated this week is all the nonsense in the news about the public sector workers’ strike and related issues. It seems that no one can agree to disagree, there are no shades of grey, and everyone has an opinion and is bloody well right. End of.
At the outset of the announcement that there was to be a strike I was firmly, and strangely for me, with the Government. I’m in a strange position with employment. I’m self-employed and work in the private sector: I get no sick pay, holiday pay, pension contributions or other fringe benefits. However, my income is derived from the Government as a solicitor in the criminal justice system. There has been talk in the past by politicians red, blue and orange (or is it yellow?) of nationalising criminal defence solicitors into a quasi-US public defence service and I believe there was a pilot project. Then a public servant with more than the usual quotient of
brain cells worked out that that would turn us into public servants with all the fringe benefits that accompany it, and that was the end of that.
I read around the issues, and I can understand why public service workers wish to protect their pensions, and morally the Government should not be entitled to change the arrangements. I’ve read that they contracted for those benefits, and they should therefore be written in stone. What I object to is this: since I qualified as a solicitor governments of both parties have continually imposed contracts on criminal defence solicitors, reduced remuneration rates, and most recently made us undertake certain cases for no payment at all. Forget about even a pretend, fairyland consultation period. I wonder how many teachers would get out of bed in the morning if they were told that they would only get paid for teaching the first lesson in the afternoon. I can hear you cry that none of this makes the current dispute over pensions right. I agree.
The source of my not inconsiderable wrath is this – teachers, nurses, fire fighters, police officers et al should receive what they contracted for (I have different views about probation officers and minions at the Parole Board and Ministry of Justice, but it’s probably best not to go there) and so do those of us that work in the private sector of the criminal justice system. The difference seems to be that the public service pundits and unionist that I’ve heard speak this week talk about entitlement, whereas we have to deal with the economic reality that if we refuse to accept the terms imposed on us we won’t have a job to go to.
And yes, with the “support” of our “union” we are intending to strike over the removal of a fee for representing a defendant who elects trial in the Crown Court and then pleads guilty on the first opportunity after the case has been committed. I’m underwhelmed by the coverage this has received in the media. Some solicitors don’t even want to discuss striking because they know from bitter experience that it is futile, and because we know we just have to get on with it, make the best of what we do have. I’m not an economist so I have to accept that the current pension arrangements are unsustainable, and I believe that some unionists have acknowledged this. I also wholeheartedly accept that the Government has been duplicitous in their dealings with the unions involved. Welcome to my world.
I’m not attempting to illicit sympathy: I am, after all, a member of one of the most hated professions, probably comingsecond only to bankers and, I hope, estate agents. I choose to remain this field because I still give a shit about justice. Perhaps the hallowed public service workers can gain some perspective too.
